First off, if you haven't checked out Jax's personal blog you should. She came home to an awesome surprise from her man. http://jaxadora.blogspot.com/2009/09/best-ever.html
Jax's blog reminded me of something I was thinking about the other day--how different men and women are but how alike we are, too. Our differences are vast. While there are men like Jax's Mr. Right who have a large creative streak in them, men tend to be more logical and streamlined in their thinking while women are more inclined to take the emotional approach to things. CIS, my husband, and I are the same way. He worries about the little things right now and I look farther out and what can be accomplished if we get creative with the little things now. I guess that's a sign that I'm the creative and emotional one in our relationship. :)
For example, I know that CIS understands what it's like to be creative. He plays the saxophone and used to do photography (and was really good). He listens to me babble about writing and plotting and characters enough that he has a good idea what I go through on a story, though he still thinks it's easy to bust out 20+ pages in one day. Doable, yes. Easy, not always.
Anyway, our oldest kiddo, Chaos has started playing the flute. Pain and agony from listening to the beginning practices has ensued. CIS and I had a debate over whether or not to get private lessons for Chaos. He wanted to get the lessons because he could have been a better sax player if his parents had been able to give him that edge, but they're not cheap and money is one of those little things CIS stresses about. (And yes, I do know that money is not a little thing.) He was so worried in fact that he decided against private lessons. I however disagreed and put our name on the sign up sheet so I could get more information. (Insert normal married couple argument here over who is right. I sort of won the first round by calmly pointing out that we don't know how much the lessons would be without getting more information to make a more informed decision. Yes, I've learned the key buzz words to use on CIS.)
So, the call comes about the lessons. They aren't cheap, but neither are they as expensive as we expected them to be and they won't be as often as we'd anticipated which helps the cost. Now, I was mostly raised by a single mother but was still afforded the opportunity to compete Arabian horses through high school. I know what she went through to make that work for me. As a writer fighting to achieve my goals, just as I did when I was a kid riding, I couldn't sit back and not give my kid the advantages that could make the difference between mediocrity and greatness if I could od it and still have food on the table and a roof over our heads. If Chaos' dream is to play the flute, and who knows where that could lead, it's our job to make it work. Right?
There was a lot of passionate emotion in my "pro lessons" argument. So much so that I almost forgot to sprinkle in the logic that hubby needed to hear. It amazed me when we finally decided to go ahead with the lessons that I was reminded so starkly of how different CIS and I are. We get so wrapped up in the day to day of being parents and the pettiness of small arguments that we sometimes lose sight of why we fell in love with a person. CIS is willing to go to bat for me or the kids on anything that we truly want. He wants to see us work hard and put in the effort without sending him into debt, but ultimately his emotions win out and we get to do most of the things we desire.
We are tremendously different creatures and I couldn't be more glad about that. Even when he drives me nutty, CIS is the best companion and partner I could have chosen.
Tell us about the person in your life that compliments you. That drives you to be your best and supports you in your passions.
Jax's blog reminded me of something I was thinking about the other day--how different men and women are but how alike we are, too. Our differences are vast. While there are men like Jax's Mr. Right who have a large creative streak in them, men tend to be more logical and streamlined in their thinking while women are more inclined to take the emotional approach to things. CIS, my husband, and I are the same way. He worries about the little things right now and I look farther out and what can be accomplished if we get creative with the little things now. I guess that's a sign that I'm the creative and emotional one in our relationship. :)
For example, I know that CIS understands what it's like to be creative. He plays the saxophone and used to do photography (and was really good). He listens to me babble about writing and plotting and characters enough that he has a good idea what I go through on a story, though he still thinks it's easy to bust out 20+ pages in one day. Doable, yes. Easy, not always.
Anyway, our oldest kiddo, Chaos has started playing the flute. Pain and agony from listening to the beginning practices has ensued. CIS and I had a debate over whether or not to get private lessons for Chaos. He wanted to get the lessons because he could have been a better sax player if his parents had been able to give him that edge, but they're not cheap and money is one of those little things CIS stresses about. (And yes, I do know that money is not a little thing.) He was so worried in fact that he decided against private lessons. I however disagreed and put our name on the sign up sheet so I could get more information. (Insert normal married couple argument here over who is right. I sort of won the first round by calmly pointing out that we don't know how much the lessons would be without getting more information to make a more informed decision. Yes, I've learned the key buzz words to use on CIS.)
So, the call comes about the lessons. They aren't cheap, but neither are they as expensive as we expected them to be and they won't be as often as we'd anticipated which helps the cost. Now, I was mostly raised by a single mother but was still afforded the opportunity to compete Arabian horses through high school. I know what she went through to make that work for me. As a writer fighting to achieve my goals, just as I did when I was a kid riding, I couldn't sit back and not give my kid the advantages that could make the difference between mediocrity and greatness if I could od it and still have food on the table and a roof over our heads. If Chaos' dream is to play the flute, and who knows where that could lead, it's our job to make it work. Right?
There was a lot of passionate emotion in my "pro lessons" argument. So much so that I almost forgot to sprinkle in the logic that hubby needed to hear. It amazed me when we finally decided to go ahead with the lessons that I was reminded so starkly of how different CIS and I are. We get so wrapped up in the day to day of being parents and the pettiness of small arguments that we sometimes lose sight of why we fell in love with a person. CIS is willing to go to bat for me or the kids on anything that we truly want. He wants to see us work hard and put in the effort without sending him into debt, but ultimately his emotions win out and we get to do most of the things we desire.
We are tremendously different creatures and I couldn't be more glad about that. Even when he drives me nutty, CIS is the best companion and partner I could have chosen.
Tell us about the person in your life that compliments you. That drives you to be your best and supports you in your passions.
Comments (2)
I'm glad you're giving Chaos lessons. She's super talented and I think it will boost her self esteem in that awkward age. :)
Aww... I'm new to your blog (happened to take a peek because I caught a stray reference by Ann Aguirre about Laura's visit today). Just wanted to say how much I enjoyed your story (and yours, Jax!) about the partners who support us, and how incredibly special and precious their understanding and encouragement is to us. Hooray to you both for having such a blessing and reminding us of ours!